In today’s world, it can often feel like we have little ability to change our lives. Many people feel trapped by the choices they’ve made. And while there are things that may need to be reluctantly accepted as reality, there are many things that don’t.
We have a lot more power to create our lives than we think. Often times, the greatest obstacle standing in our way is our repetitive habit of focusing on the negative and all the things we feel can’t change. However, when we develop the practice of pausing to consider what we do want and think about the ways we can make those things happen, our lives begin to shift.
I’m currently working with a client who hired me to help her reinvent her life. She felt stuck in a mid-life rut, felt socially isolated, bored and tired. This is a very common reason people hire me. She was spending too much of her time repeating her reality and not enough time creating a vision of what her life could be. During our first few months together, she worked on imagining a new life. I took her through several steps and the results have been excellent.
If you find yourself wanting a new life, consider creating it with these same four steps:
- Look at what’s not working in your life. Identify what things can be changed and what things need to be accepted.
- Create your vision. Pause to consider what your life could look like in the various areas you want to change. For example, in the case of my client, she wanted to feel more socially connected with others. We stopped to consider who she’d like to spend more time with and where she could meet new people, based on her interests. This sounds obvious, but when we get into a rut, it’s not always apparent.
- Consider what needs to be addressed in order for the various changes to occur. Is it something you can do alone, or is it something you need to work on with someone else in your life? We discovered that one pitfall my client made was not having plans scheduled in advance, so she would always go home after work to unwind. She would often convince herself that she would rally and go back out to do something fun, but as many of us know firsthand, she lost all momentum once she got settled in from the day. Now she plans her social calendar and makes plans with people in advance. She knows she needs to commit herself so she has accountability.
- Be realistic. It’s important to realize that even though we want positive changes, the road to get there can often feel burdensome. We have to push ourselves until the changes we want begin to feel natural. At first, change can feel contrived and uncomfortable. You have to “fake it ‘til you make it.”
If you are ready to create a new life, but don’t know where to start, let me help you! Sign up for a complimentary coaching session today.
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